Someone I know recently asked: Is having a degree from college important, if so, why? If not, why not? He went on to wonder about the role of different levels of education in relationships and if educational or monetary success was more important. As I thought about my answer, I thought I would share it here. People have often asked me why I have continued to pursue further degrees, and more often than not, have made incorrect assumptions as to my reasoning, much to my annoyance.
I am not getting more degrees so I can earn more money. Monetary success is not a goal in my life. I want to make enough to live and have a bit of fun, but beyond that, it’s not a big deal for me.
I am continuing to go to school because I am not finished. Lisa Giles is not a finished product. There are still more things that I can add to who I am, and going to school is one way to do that. I am also adding to myself through many other means as well. I want to get all the education and learning that I can. I spend far too much money at bookstores (or not enough depending on how you look at it). I’m learning to belly dance. I’m training for two marathons. I’m making more quilts than I can even remember. And I’m discovering a fascination with how the brain works and how we learn and I’m pursuing that fascination in the best way possible, by learning from other people who know more about it than I do at this point.
I’m still going to school because it is a challenge. My brain gets bored and needs to be challenged. School provides a way to push myself to finish things and to stretch my brain and see where my limits are and then push them even further out. I’m not even sure I’ll stop after a doctorate. I might continue with another Masters or another Doctorate. I’ll just have to see where I’m at in my life then.
Now, the role of education in those I date. I’m turned on by a guy who can intellectually challenge me, who can converse with me about all sorts of topics. I’m turned on by a guy who will take the time to learn new things, ponder, search, even debate with me. The brain is a very sexy organ. Which is a nice thing because muscles don’t always stay strong, but someone who knows how to learn and enjoys it is much more likely to have a strong sexy brain when they get old.
Of course I realize that there are more ways to learn than by going to school, but I do want to date/marry a man who has at least one degree completed, or is working on it and has a real good reason why it isn’t finished yet. He doesn’t have to have the same number of degrees as me, as long as he’s okay with what I have.
Part of why it is important to me for a guy to have a degree is in a lot of ways because it shows they have commitment and can finish things, even if they get hard.
It’s not about how much money the man makes. Monetary success is probably the last thing I’d look for in a man I’d consider dating. A focus on it is not something I look for or enjoy in people I associate with either. It’s so one focused and limiting. Money just isn’t important to me. So not only would I stop dating someone who’s sole focus was that, I probably wouldn’t even start in the first place.